Brandelyn: Lyrical Contradiction

And Yet another...No Tanto Mucho Moment

            So yesterday I was at work. I had a couple hours before our weekly staff check in’s so I decided to take a moment and roll to IKEA right quick. I figured that there would only be a few people in the store as it was the middle of the afternoon on a Wednesday. Right. So I get over there, park, roll into the store and I promise you, AMERICA was in this store!! I sighed, grabbed a basket, fought my way through the marketplace to pick up the four items I needed from IKEA. It took all of 10 minutes plus and extra five to peruse the As-Is section, of course, and I was in and out in record time. Feeling proud of myself I make my way over to the check out lanes and my mouth fell completely open. I though America as in the store, well the rest of the continents were chillen at the check out lanes because I thought I was at Magic Mountain on a Saturday in the summer.  I haven’t seen lines that long since I was standing in line to buys books and get my ID at Cal. No Tan Mu.  The lines snaked all way into the furniture section and out of the 20 lanes, there were only 4 check stands open. I take a deep breath, glance down at my meager basket and silently contemplate if it is worth it. Fearing having to come back and deal with this again, I find the “shortest” line and settle in for the long haul. As I’m standing there, listening to people complain about how long it was taking and how it wasn’t worth it to wait. As we are standing there, the lights above us begin to flicker and the power suddenly goes out and the emergency lights come on.

What.

 For the briefest moment, there is complete silence in the store. A voice on the loud speaker comes on and says “Ladies and Gentleman, it seems that we are suffering from a power outage. Please remain calm and we will get you out of the store as quickly as possible. We apologize for the inconvenience.”

Once the voice stopped talking, almost in unison, the employee’s at the check stands seemingly shrug their shoulders and continue to go on about their business, however, now everything has to be done manually. The store may not have any power, but IKEA was going to get it’s money. So 25 minutes later, I make it up to the check stand and see your girl ringing up the woman in front of me using a calculator and a card imprint machine.

What.

It took her a minute because she couldn’t figure out how to add the tax, so the woman she was ringing up finally grabbed the calculator from her and did it herself. I’m glad that wasn’t me because I couldn’t help you. So as I’m standing there, some nice women from the restaurant area came by handing out cookies trying to keep people calm. Which honestly, was a really good idea because how much of an attitude can you really have if you are eating cookies? So I finally get up to the line, your girl breaks out her calculator, makes an imprint of my card, takes another five minutes to figure out the tax while I stared at her blankly and after an hour, I was finally on my way.

No Tanto Mucho

Peace Y’all

B